OK this page is about writing the truth about my TBI.
Yesterday I was rock bottom and still sinking. The main instigator of this was falling out with my husband. But things kept adding to it over the day :
- I wasn't going to the gym
- I was eating bad food
- my niece hasn't written back to me despite my messages, maybe my sister has stopped her
- big bill from my artist website design site, yet nobody is buying my work
Everything was adding together to make me feel horrible. Fuck everything I'll just eat what I want, there's no point in trying.
Today though :
- somebody has written to maybe buy a painting
- my niece has written to me today to thank me for my messages
- I went to the gym
- yeah OK still been to the shops to buy tasty food!
It makes me think. I didn't used to have things add up together like this. I mean when I think back I used to have far worse problems. But it didn't snowball the way it does now.
I think it's about self esteem. When you think you're alright, worth something, then things like this don't really stick to you and drag you down.
But when self esteem is low like mine currently is, each one is like a ball and chain that makes it impossible to move forward in your life.
Comments