Reference to my sister

Right, I'm uncomfortable with this post, I worry that it might be a jealous one. If I hadn't fallen out with my sister so badly then hands up, I know I wouldn't feel like this.

Since my parents visiting and talking so freely about my sister visiting them, this has stayed on my mind.

I've written before how my sister has featured on Countryfile a few times and has looked good. A few Christmases ago I was wandering around Waterstones with Paul and saw that my sister's book had been placed very obviously.

I picked it up, turned it over, and found printed on the back that Sue Perkins had reviewed it. I love Sue Perkins and I immediately felt angry and put the book down. Yes I admit it, I was jealous. Jealous that a woman who I really like and admire, had read my sister's book.

My Mum talked this weekend about how my sister had met up with Clare Balding and gone for a nature walk with her.

My Mum also mentioned that Nigella Lawson has written about my sister in one of her books.

Why does this bother me? If I hadn't fallen out with my sister I would be genuinely pleased for her, that she is doing so well in the public eye. So what is it, jealousy?Maybe it's more that I'm struggling to get my life back after my TBI. And feeling that everybody else - including my sister - is progressing with their lives and achieving success. But I hate myself for feeling like this.