Friends. People who I cared for before and those I made after my TBI.
I've talked about her before, my friend Jane. I missed her deeply when we went to Melbourne. When I had my TBI she phoned Paul every day for 3 weeks afterwards to support him. That's the kind of person she was.
When I got back to Glasgow, I wasn't aware of it, but I was different. My head didn't analyse and think of the world in the same way. Jane could see that and our friendship drifted, until she died. I wanted it to be the same as before I left, but it was never the same again. I still struggle to deal with that.
I took endless photos of Jane's husband and painted a triptych of him when in Melbourne. He was a guy of few words, but when he spoke they were worth listening too. When Jane died, I suspect he felt he was finished. He died himself shortly after.
When my boy was 12 weeks old, he cried a lot and was struggling to sleep. I write a post on Facebook, on an appropriate page. It eventually resolved and we moved on. 18 months later I magically found (!) a message that someone had written to me about my son. She had of course received no answer and I felt terrible and wrote to her to tell her that. She immediately suggested that we meet in the local park and I did. That was the beginning of my friendship with Lisa and her little boy Cole.
I can and I have, said everything to Lisa. There are no holds barred between us. It is trust, support, love. When I think about it, she is someone who met me after my TBI. She never knew me before it. What she knows is the new me, the new person readjusting to my life. I can't tell you how much that means to me.
When my little boy started going to school, he met a little girl called Elodie. From what I hear, they spent lots of time together playing and exploring the natural world. It's become very clear that he's a much happier little lad in school since this bond came about! I have since met Elodie's mum Kate through this, which has led to brilliant playdates and wee holidays. And when the opportunity arises, we can share a bottle of wine and talk late into the night about life. Again a friendship after my TBI that I really appreciate x
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